January 30, 2010

E-mail as a form of communication

A couple of weeks ago, one of the gals in our Sunday school class took off down a bunny-trail about how e-mail is a horrible way of communicating with people. The irony was that several people in the room were quite comfortable with email as a means of communication and a few even preferred it.

I'm still working my way through Adam McHugh's book, Introverts in the Church, and I just came across some quotes by him that summarize quite nicely, in my opinion, the strengths of email -- especially for the introvert who may prefer this medium to phone communication.

"E-mail, in particular, allows us to think before we communicate, to correspond at our own pace and to change what we say before we send it.  E-mail doesn't make the immediate social demands that cell phones do, and it enables us to communicate without interruption.  In addition, there is a degree of distance in communication via e-mail, and this distance frees us to be more vulnerable than we might normally be."

I already knew all that.  But sometimes it's nice to hear someone else say it.

44 comments:

  1. I would rather email if I have issues.. that or go to say the dr's office to make the appointment weird uh? I will call but I still dont like it less we are really good friends

    ReplyDelete
  2. I LOVE email. Actually any kind of online communication is better then actually talking to me. Most people are pretty surprised IRL, I don't talk. I definitely need that lag time to think of what I want to say and formulate something intelligent and/or not mean and offensive (cuz it may not start out that way in my head, but more often then not it comes out like that).

    ETA: my doctor just started allowing patients to email the office to make an appt!!! I love that.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Advantages to email: 1. Convenience - communicate whenever you want and the recipients can receive the mail whenever they want; 2. Some people think more clearly through the written word, while others talk in order to think (which often gets them into more trouble than email - at least you can revise, edit or delete email before sending it); 3. Saves on time when one has to communicate to a mass of people; 4. and then some

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'll add 5. it allows you to communicate with people who aren't on your schedule. I'm forever returning emails after midnight, and I have a lot of people I notice are writing back to me at 5 am. I doubt we'd ever get it together to call each other!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. In the church plant, back in 1997, one of the leadership team raked me over the coals for using email...and he was a few years younger than I! He wanted me to personally call every single person or family at the new church in order to convey any information or news. And that was being a good steward of my time? Let's see... 10-30 minutes per household x 30 households. I told him no. He complained of my defiance and insubordination (he wasn't even an elder).

    ReplyDelete
  6. i agree. i'd rather communicate by email or in person but if i have to do it by phone it'll probably take an extra week or two before i get up the gumption. (then again, there are some phone calls that take me months to muster up. *sigh* and other times i'm in the moment and hop right on the phone and deal with the issue before i can think twice.)

    ReplyDelete
  7. The problem with the lady is what we all often do: elevate personal preferences to the level of God's law.

    ReplyDelete
  8. well, that's the other key problem with a phone call. it's very rare that you can call and say what you need to say then hang up. usually you've got to start out with, "how're you doing?" and then you talk about your day, then you bring up your issue that you called about, then that leads to several tangents before you're finally allowed to hang up the phone. one phone call can often wipe me out for the entire day. i feel like i've been punched repeatedly in the stomach and i need to recover. (the extrovert on the other end of the line, however, is probably left feeling like they just made your day a little better. *sigh*)

    ReplyDelete
  9. lol! i don't know that she's elevated it quite that high yet. close, but not quite level. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. e-mail is ok...but I get so many [as I have so many interests], that it becomes a chore sometimes, not a pleasure to communicate with people that way...so I try to cut down on e-mails and link with people other ways..
    I prefer forums like this, where it's usually a group communication...
    one to one can bring pressures sometimes

    ReplyDelete
  11. Nothing can replace face-to-face conversation. You know when the message is transmitted properly (and understood) by questions and by checking the listener reactions. But, an e-mail is better than a phone call, exactly for the reasons you mentioned. The only advantage I see in a phone call is that you can get questions about what you've said right away and know better if the message was understood. It doesn't happen so fast with written communication.

    ReplyDelete
  12. ah, that reminds me of another advantage to an email (which came in handy when the contractor painted the downstairs the wrong color). you can go back and verify that you actually did say something that some else forgot you said.

    ReplyDelete
  13. yes to 1-5 - but also to what rogerio said - there are pros and cons to each of these modes of communication. and as drdo pointed out - there is a question of personal preferences, and we humans tend so often to pick our own personal preference and assume that it's going to work for everyone else.

    I love email and social networking for all the reasons mentioned. It allows me time to think and edit, it allows me to communicate with people at a time that suits me, it's a wonderful invention - though, yes, I still find it hugely valuable once in a while to have face-to-face time with a friend. and phone calls with some friends are excellent - but it's a question of finding the right time... as an introvert, I'm not always feeling up to a phone call.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I agree that it has it's advantages but it also deprives us of spontaneity and the ability to accurate detect and convey emotion.

    ReplyDelete
  15. says the extrovert. ;-)

    hey, see? i just conveyed emotion. here's some more that i know you'll particularly appreciate --> *eyeroll*

    :-}

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yeah but the inflection is missing, and my senses remain starved.

    ReplyDelete
  17. insertAudioReply('barefootmeg:video:89','upload-barefootmeg-89','');

    ReplyDelete
  18. hmmm, i tried to record a video reply and it was blurry. so then naomi and i did an audio reply and i can't hear it. we'll try again.

    ReplyDelete
  19. insertMulTV('barefootmeg:video:90','upload-barefootmeg-90','');

    ReplyDelete
  20. naomi figured out that the video recorder was blurry because the camera had gook over it.

    the video is just a bit of goofiness. but you've got to admit rick, it's still better than a phone call, eh?

    ReplyDelete
  21. this just so demonstrates the difference between introverts and extroverts. there's rick complaining about his senses being starved in an email (which to me as an introvert seems like a great way to communicate) and there's me looking at a video reply and thinking: oh no, do I have to be exposed to audio and visual stimuli? (not too bad, even I can cope with watching ten seconds of this...)

    ReplyDelete
  22. I did enjoy watching Naomi stand up for her self against tyranny, but getting to watch that just proves all the more the immediate richness of the visual over the textual,

    ReplyDelete
  23. insertAudioReply('barefootmeg:video:91','upload-barefootmeg-91','');

    ReplyDelete
  24. love the accent Meg

    I have hundreds of smilies which can emphasise mood and meaning quite well, and give to the senses... :)

    above is for those who need sound for the sense..
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Synchronous communications (face-to-face, phone, videochat), near-synchronous (instant messenger, SMS, IRC) and asynchronous (mail, email, usenet, Multiply) communications all have their place. It's very hard to carry on multiple conversations simultaneously using different synchronous or near-synchronous forms of communication (i.e. talking on the phone and IM'ing at the same time) though.

    Synchronous communication is great if something critical requires immediate and undivided attention. If someone thinks what they have to say is that important, they're likely to dislike email. (IMHO they're also likely to be terribly annoying.)

    ReplyDelete
  26. if someone thinks what they have to say is that important, it's likely that I'd much prefer them to email :)

    ReplyDelete
  27. this is pretty much what I was thinking - it's not so much a question of one mode of communication being better than another, it's a question of different ones being better for different situations. I don't want my husband to email me (unless he's away).

    ReplyDelete
  28. That is me to a T! I'm so relieved I'm not the only one. I prefer online communication first and foremost, then in person communication as a distant second and dead last is the phone. Unfortunately for me, I have to talk on the phone some at work. I find that I return messages as soon as I get to the office (before I can think about it)...or I'll end up putting them off for days.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I email rob sometimes even when we're only one room away -- and for many of the reasons mentioned here. If he's in the middle of something I might not want to interrupt. So emailing him allows him to deal with whatever is whenever he has the time. I also tend to forward things to him or send him links which, of course, is easier to do via email than verbally. ("hey rob, check out w. w. w. dot w. h. e. n. h. a. m. s. t. e. r. s. a. t. t. a. c. k. dot c.o.m." yup, definitely doesn't work as well verbally.)

    ReplyDelete
  30. I prefer emails, especially for ministry issues because they provide an accurate and verifiable paper trail in case of any misunderstandings or such. Plus, I find it better for formulating what I want or need to say. Of course, for personal talks with a friend nothing beats face to face, but for business email works best for me

    ReplyDelete
  31. i have an appointment that i need to set up for anna and it's been 2 months now that "call the orthodontist" has been on my to-do list. *sigh*

    ReplyDelete
  32. you're right, meg, my example absolutely sucks. my husband and I use notes pretty much the way you and rob use email.

    it really goes back to what I said before I came up with that useless example - it all depends on the situation. different ways of communicating are good for different situations. if I'm busy my husband leaves me a note rather than interrupt me, and vice versa. (we just don't email each other as he would have to come to use my computer to read it if I sent him an email... not very practical... lol)

    ReplyDelete
  33. lol!

    i don't think your example was bad. like you said, different applications for different problems.

    ReplyDelete
  34. lol... no, it was a bad example because I just said "I don't want my husband to email me" when what I really meant was something like: I don't want my husband to email me instead of sitting on the sofa with me and looking at me with those lovely eyes of his... what I was ineptly trying to say was that there are some types of communication that need to happen face to face. what I omitted was that there are some types of husband-wife communication that could be done perfectly well by email. (except when husband doesn't have his own computer, as in our case...)

    ReplyDelete
  35. That SO sounds like me. And I always feel like I've accomplished a TON when I take care of a phone call. It's always struck me as silly, but you've made it make more sense to me now.

    ReplyDelete
  36. "10) If a hamster is chasing you, climb up a tree and hang onto one of the branches. But be forewarned: if the hamster waves at you, DO NOT WAVE BACK (it’s an old hamster trick which might make you fall out of the tree)."

    ReplyDelete
  37. that's an important tip. you never know when you'll be caught in the middle of a hamster attack.

    ReplyDelete
  38. same here. making a phone call seems like climbing a mountain. give me an email address and I'm fine... my doctors' surgery now has a system for booking appointments online and for me that makes a huge difference. making phone calls - especially to strangers - takes a huge amount of effort from me.

    ReplyDelete
  39. http://mashable.com/2010/02/08/communication-social-media/

    Pretty cool comparison from Twitter to meeting in person passing through e-mail...

    ReplyDelete
  40. I agree. It's nice to hear someone else say that! While I prefer the phone I know others that prefer communicating via e-mail.

    I wrote a short blog on the importance of communication.

    http://www.press8.com/joomla/visit-our-blog

    ReplyDelete

Leave me a note!